Join Gina in New Orleans for CHADD: 11/12-14/15

Now's your chance—to learn in two-three days an amazing amount about ADHD and meet hundreds of other people on this journey. I invite you to join me and many other ADHD experts in New Orleans, Nov. 12-14, 2015, for the CHADD International Conference.

There is something for everyone: parents, educators, adults, and mental-health professionals. Plus, the conference hotel (Hyatt Regency) is very close to the French Quarter and the riverfront. I'd love to see you there!

As in years past, I will be presenting, this time on Saturday, 10:30 am. My topic will be: Adult ADHD Symptoms or Poor Coping Skills? Clarifying the Confusion with Success Strategies. 

Here's a quick summary of my talk:

Most adults with ADHD struggle for decades before being diagnosed. Consequently, many have developed poor coping skills and distorted explanations of their challenges.

In parallel fashion, their loved ones—spouses, intimate partners, siblings, and parents—typically develop their own dysfunctional patterns in reaction to dealing with poorly managed ADHD-related behaviors in the relationship and household. It all makes for quite the “roller coaster.”

Even when ADHD is identified, the confusion continues. Symptoms are variable and lifelong adaptations even more variable. Loved ones also span the spectrum of human strengths and foibles.

How then do individuals with ADHD and their loved ones find their footing as they navigate a mental healthcare system that is seldom "ADHD-friendly"?

How do they distinguish symptoms from counterproductive habits and then appropriately target evidence-based strategies?

See you there, and Laissez le Bontemps Roulez!

—Gina Pera

The "Gifts of ADHD": Transforming Humiliation into Humility

A big obstacle faced by couples dealing with ADHD is denial -- that is, either partner refuses to concede that ADHD exists, that it is causing challenges, or that effective strategies truly exist.

The reasons for denial around ADHD are myriad and complex. For some who arrive at the diagnosis in adulthood, though, it's simple: ADHD feels like one more negative label, right down there with lazy, unmotivated, and careless. The temptation then might be to wholly reject the label and instead cling to a more "positive" spin: ADHD is a gift. In this month's guest post, San Diego-based psychotherapist and ADHD expert Lew Mills, Ph.D., MFT (pictured below), offers a nuanced way to reconcile "gift" and "disorder."

(To learn more about denial's psychological and even physiological foundations, check out the August and October 2008 issues of CHADD's Attention magazine, which excerpt my book's chapters on the topic. If you missed these issues, remember that CHADD members can access an online treasure trove of past Attention articles.)

I  look forward to your comments!  --   Gina Pera

You can always start a debate amongst a group of people with ADHD by asking whether ADHD is a "disorder" or a "difference." Is it a curse or a gift? It's everyone's favorite topic, and everyone has an opinion. Actually, I have two opinions. Like many big questions, the answer lies somewhere not just in the middle but at both ends.

Is It "Miscommunication"—or Could It Be Adult ADHD?

With a warm smile and a kiss, Diane welcomed fiancé George at her front door and then noticed fresh mud on his shoes. In a pleasant tone of voice, she asked him to please leave his boots on the stairs. 

Puzzled, he said, "Your suits stare? Huh? What on earth are you talking about?" Despite her clarification, George remained convinced that Diane had said exactly that. Moreover, she'd said it with that tone (presumably, the disapproving kind). 

    
  It wasn't this pair's first tangled communication. In fact, it happened so often, George had his hearing checked but it seemed fine. Their couples therapist suggested that George might bear deep-seated psychological resistance to listening to Diane.

Can You Hear Me Now?

       Fortunately, George's ADHD diagnosis came just as these "miscommunications" reached fever pitch. He and Diane felt relief when the cognitive therapist explained how ADHD has a common traveling companion called Central Auditory Processing Disorder (CAPD). Briefly, it can cause a person to misinterpret content and even tone of voice (more details about CAPD in a minute). The therapist provided the couple strategies for enhancing communications, noting that stimulant medication can often help "strengthen the signal."